Another Time in the Castle
by Spring Zephyr
Summary: A series of drabbles based on Fire Emblem Heroes: Soren tutors children for free, Jaffar is asked to conduct an underwear survey, and more to come! This is not a serious fic.
1. Lute and Henry

**I don't have Lute, but I want her. After this drabble I'll stick to writing Heroes I do have.**

"I heard you're attempting to make a hex that kills one hundred people simultaneously," Lute announced loudly, making her presence known. "Well, I stopped by to tell you that's impossible."

The man in front of her was thin and pale. The mantle he wore helped disguise it, somewhat, but even with his back turned to her, studying a tome from the castle library, she could tell his shoulders weren't particularly wide. According to the other castle mages, he called himself Henry and the majority seemed to think he was best left to his own designs.

He didn't deign to look at her as he responded, "Anything is possible."

His voice was unexpectedly high-pitched, but that alone wasn't enough to surprise Lute. If every little thing surprised her, after all, what right would she have to call herself a genius?

"Anything except this. If it were possible, I would have already already devised such a thing – no, my hex could kill a thousand... no, a hundred thousand enemy troops all at once." Henry shot her a closed-eyed look, and she politely explained, "I am superior, after all."

Some people found her oddities insufferable. Henry just asked, "How many crow feathers do you think I'll need in order to fly?"


	2. Soren and Nino

**This one is loosely inspired by a Reddit comment about Nino practicing reading with children's books. Originally, I planned to write Merric and Nino, but Soren sounded more interesting. Merric shall appear in the future!**

"Where's Merric?"

"Busy."

"Oscar?"

"Sent him to the Training Tower with Priscilla and a couple of others."

Soren sighed, knowing full well that the summoner wouldn't be asking him such a favor if there were anyone else available, yet – he kept hoping there was someone more eligible that they'd somehow forgotten about. "What about Subaki or Lucina? Titania? Lucius?"

"It's just one afternoon," the summoner replied, their face expressionless. "Nino's a good student, you'll see..."

X

Whether or not Nino was a good student wasn't the problem. Obviously, Soren had been chosen on account of his own academic abilities and not because of any particular gift with children or teaching. But since he'd been chosen for the job, there were no options left other than to quietly resign himself to the task. He also hadn't needed Titania's reassurance that he'd be a fine tutor to buckle down and do it, though admittedly he hadn't minded it either.

Soren arrived exactly on time, and Nino was already waiting for him. Which meant they were off to a good start, he supposed.

He introduced himself as he sat down, and kept it formal and curt for both of their sakes. "My name is Soren – "

"I know who you are!"

While there might be Heroes in this castle who knew of him, Soren didn't particularly go out of his way to interact with anyone unfamiliar to him.

" – and I'll be substituting for Merric today."

Part of him was annoyed for acting like Nino was stupid – there was no reason to speak this slowly to her. But Nino didn't seem to mind, so he continued, "According to Merric, you're supposed to have your first independent reading session today. I can assist if you struggle, otherwise Merric wants you to at least sound the words out on your own. You'll be reading a book called..."

Soren paused. He hadn't actually looked at the book yet, but when he did his frown deepened. "'The Very Hungry Caterpillar'? How is this going to benefit the Askran army?"


	3. Jaffar and Summoner

"I need your help," the summoner, taking easier steps than most in Jaffar's direction, announced.

Until recently, they had treated Jaffar as a shadow, the way he ought to be. A shadow or a tool, but since he'd spent several months warming benches between the time he was summoned and the time his summoner realized how effective he could be when equipped with Poison Strike and Savage Blow, he'd gotten used to being a shadow.

 _"Nino's doing well in her reading lessons,"_ Jaffar imagined them saying. _"Do you know how to read? Do you want to learn with Nino?"_

But wait, that was a question, not a request -

"I need you to conduct a survey about what type of underwear everyone is wearing, or whether or not they're wearing undies at all..."

The Angel of Death's eyes widened - not much, hardly even noticeably, but just enough to call into question the legitimacy of his emotionless nature for anyone who could've spotted it. Nino, for example. Both of them may have thought of Nino at roughly the same time, for the summoner quickly added, "Okay, maybe not _everyone_. But I made a bet with a friend over whether or not the Performing Artists were wearing underwear, then we started looking at some of the other Heroes, then wondering if Heroes from Tellius wore different undergarments than Heroes from, uh, Hoshido and Nohr, for example..."

When he'd told the summoner to think of him as a tool, this was not the kind of task he'd had in mind.

"I-if you don't want to, I guess I could ask Jakob... or Mathew..."

"I'll do it," Jaffar replied.

'Any mission,' he reminded himself. He had said he could handle any mission.

 **Based off a true story, from that time when UnderdogHero and I spent way too much time talking about what kind of underwear Fire Emblem characters wear.**


	4. Soren and Nino 2

"The veh... vvvvv... vehrrry..."

"The very hungry caterpillar!" Soren exclaimed, dragging his hands through his hair. "It's the title of the book!"

Nino didn't notice his lack of patience - or more likely, it just didn't bother her - which was great, because rumor had it that a recent mission Jaffar had been given had put him in a very foul mood. Upsetting Nino was not something anyone wanted to risk right now.

"The Very Hungry Caterpillar?" a familiar voice echoed. "I _love_ that book!"

Soon, Soren found himself reading with not just Nino, but also Mist... who was quickly joined by Maria, Fae, one of the Kanas, and an Elise who was, for some reason, wearing a swimsuit in the middle of October, while Raigh skulked in the back corner pretending not to be interested. Unfortunately for Soren, he had never wanted to become a babysitter.


	5. Raigh and Mist

"-And another thing, how did the author come up with the idea to punch holes into paper like that? The bright colors and innovative design capture the reader's attention, but the use of repetition and outlandish narrative make it easy for even an inexperienced reader to grasp the basic patterns of reading comprehension -"

"I thought you didn't care about 'that stupid baby book'," Mist pointed out.

They were walking together not by choice, as Raigh would like it to be known to every Hero in the castle, but because their barracks were in the same direction. That was the only reason.

It wasn't like he secretly thought Mist was a very nice person and wanted to share his overly detailed analysis of a book clearly not targeted at his age or reading ability with anyone or anything.

"Because I don't care about that stupid book!" he quickly replied, before he went back to rambling.

 **Aaaand this marks the end of all the Hungry Caterpillar jokes I had planned.**


End file.
